My Spiritual Director on Friday said that despite how confusing life feels to me at the moment he could see a very strong common thread weaving all aspects of my life together. However when I asked him what the thread was he couldn't really answer. His answer was a cop out (which he knew) and was along the lines of "it's an inner thing - somthing inside you". We also discussed when this particular thread might have started, but didn't come to any conclusions.
Thinking about it now, the image that the common thread that had been in my life was cut very abruptly (by others), is quite a good way of describing how I felt - "severed from the common thread of my life". At the time it seemed I was completely severed but maybe it was with a very blunt knife and that there were still straggly bits of the thread hanging on to things. For more than a year I have lived threadless - aimlessly wandering through life, stopping the things that were part of the previous thread - stopping them gently rather than abruptly as many of them affected other people not just me. May be that's part of this new thread - that untill I put down all things of the old thread I still had my hands too full to pick up this new thread. What is this thread? even if it is an inner thing what is it? what colour? what texture? how strong is it? will it be weaved with other threads to be stronger brighter more beautiful? will it have knots in it? decorative knots or just tangled knots? Whatever it's strength will this one also be severed by others? severed by me? will it come to a genlte end, or become part of some one elses weaving?
